This is Your Brain on Aphorisms: An Unconventional Convention

This is Your Brain on Aphorisms: An Unconventional Convention
I was born a young baby. Then I grew up. Then I grew confused. Then I grew tired. I'm a 20th century man who's somehow been transported to the 21st century, with one foot in the gone past and the other in the here now. I started my blog mymanymoodsofme toward the end of 2012. There I write humorous essays, stories and poems (lyrics from my songs), in addition to my aphorisms. It's good work... if you get it. In my spare time I play chess, write songs, and reflect upon what I see. I'm very happy to be colluding with Humor Times, and hope you enjoy the result. Cheers!
Ralph Lombard

The Republican’s convention lies in their contention. When it comes to giving speeches, Trump has always toad the line. The President’s big “hit” song: Damagin’ (All the People). … Read more

Ripping the Headlines Today, 4/28/20

Ripping the Headlines Today, 4/28/20
Paul Lander is not sure which he is proudest of -- winning the Noble Peace Prize or sending Congolese gynecologist Dr. Denis Mukwege to accept it on his behalf, bringing to light the plight of African women in war-torn countries. In his non-daydreaming hours, Paul has written for Weekly Humorist, National Lampoon, American Bystander, Huff Post Comedy, McSweeney's, Bombeck Writers Workshop Blog and the Humor Times, written and/or produced for multiple TV shows and written standup material that's been performed on Maher, The Daily Show, Colbert, Kimmel, etc. Now, on to Paul's time-commanding Special Forces in Khandahar… (See all of Paul's "Ripping the Headlines Today" columns here.)
Paul Lander
Latest posts by Paul Lander (see all)

Making fun of the headlines today, so you don’t have to The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is … Read more

Kim Jong Un Accepts Endorsement Deal with 7-Up

Kim Jong Un Accepts Endorsement Deal with 7-Up
I was born a young baby. Then I grew up. Then I grew confused. Then I grew tired. I'm a 20th century man who's somehow been transported to the 21st century, with one foot in the gone past and the other in the here now. I started my blog mymanymoodsofme toward the end of 2012. There I write humorous essays, stories and poems (lyrics from my songs), in addition to my aphorisms. It's good work... if you get it. In my spare time I play chess, write songs, and reflect upon what I see. I'm very happy to be colluding with Humor Times, and hope you enjoy the result. Cheers!
Ralph Lombard

New endorsement deal to feature Kim Jong Un as spokesman for the popular soda. To add to all of the swirling rumors and growing confusion concerning Kim Jong … Read more

Trump: Secret Plans to Escape Indictment?

Trump: Secret Plans to Escape Indictment?
Diane de Anda is a third generation Latina and retired UCLA professor. Tired of cranking out technical articles in a "publish or perish" atmosphere, she now spends most of her time writing adult fiction, children's books, parody, and satire.Her weapon of choice is the limerick, aimed with humor and a touch of malice at society's icons, celebrities, politicians, and other irritating folk.
Diane de Anda

As the Trump-Kim bromance continues, rumors circulate of plans to escape indictment. An anonymous source has just informed this reporter of a secret plan to escape indictment that … Read more

Kim Jong-Un Says Trump is ‘Stalking’ Him, Demands Restraining Order

Kim Jong-Un Says Trump is ‘Stalking’ Him, Demands Restraining Order
Michael was born in South Africa at the height of the apartheid era He quickly became involved in the underground resistance movement, knew Nelson Mandela and other prominent revolutionaries, some of whom later moved into privileged positions formerly occupied by whites. After several exciting escapes, he was forced to flee the country in disguise. He successfully made his way to the UK and gained his PhD at Cambridge on a university scholarship, He then pursued the dualcareer of college professor and social revolutionary, provoking academic and political mayhemwherever he went. Having thus failed miserably at both politics and education, he now cynically rails like Diogenes at the foibles of mankind in bitter satires and faintly subtly edgy political cartoons. History will, however absolve him. In 2006 he discovered a new Shakespeare play, but it's going to take a new generation to acknowledge it. Check out his website, Editorial and Political Cartoons.
Michael Egan

“Okay, so I wrote the old dotard a couple of nice letters once,” the North Korean leader admitted in his demand for a restraining order, “but I’m tired … Read more

Top 10 Trump Ailments: Calling in Sick

Top 10 Trump Ailments: Calling in Sick
Marilyn Sands is a former 80's Stand-Up Comic & Comic Booker. Sold Jokes to Joan Rivers & lesser lights. Was up one night & wrote 2 Madcap Screenplays & a Stage Play. Her hilarious book "CAN YOU PEE OUTDOORS" On-Line Dating Straight Lines is on amazon.com/dp/1733487409And, "OWNING THE STAGE, RENTING THE BALLS"!My Life as a Funny Girlis on amazon.com/dp/1733487417"Living proofyou don't have to be a success to write a Memoir"!And yes, this bio is my OBIT too!haha
Marilyn Sands

Couldn’t be McDonald’s, Burger King or Kentucky Fried Chicken – our 45th President worries us sick… Having a little ‘Impeachment Jitters’ – Donald Trump secretly ran to Walter … Read more

Trump to Open Luxury “Fat-Farm” Resort in North Korea

Trump to Open Luxury “Fat-Farm” Resort in North Korea
I was born a young baby. Then I grew up. Then I grew confused. Then I grew tired. I'm a 20th century man who's somehow been transported to the 21st century, with one foot in the gone past and the other in the here now. I started my blog mymanymoodsofme toward the end of 2012. There I write humorous essays, stories and poems (lyrics from my songs), in addition to my aphorisms. It's good work... if you get it. In my spare time I play chess, write songs, and reflect upon what I see. I'm very happy to be colluding with Humor Times, and hope you enjoy the result. Cheers!
Ralph Lombard

“Fat-farm” resort paradise set to open next spring Donald Trump today announced plans for a luxury “fat-farm” vacation property in North Korea to be opened early next year. … Read more

Seldom Reliable Sources Reveal Yet More of Trump’s Telephone Tag Game

Seldom Reliable Sources Reveal Yet More of Trump’s Telephone Tag Game
Dave's political satire and short humor have appeared in most major North American newspapers. He is also the author of several humor collections including "Dare to be Average", "Screams & Whispers" and "King Donald I" available on Amazon.
David Martin
Latest posts by David Martin (see all)

More phone calls by Trump you haven’t yet heard about reveal a Pandora’s Box of telephone tag conversations with foreign leaders. With the latest revelation of an inappropriate … Read more

This July 4th: All Hail Il Douché

This July 4th: All Hail Il Douché
Dave's political satire and short humor have appeared in most major North American newspapers. He is also the author of several humor collections including "Dare to be Average", "Screams & Whispers" and "King Donald I" available on Amazon.
David Martin
Latest posts by David Martin (see all)

Fear not, citizens, those tanks are just part of President Trump’s brand new, fabulous July 4th celebration! As military tanks are secretly transported into Washington, locals can be … Read more

Ripping the Headlines Today, 7/1/19

Ripping the Headlines Today, 7/1/19
Paul Lander is not sure which he is proudest of -- winning the Noble Peace Prize or sending Congolese gynecologist Dr. Denis Mukwege to accept it on his behalf, bringing to light the plight of African women in war-torn countries. In his non-daydreaming hours, Paul has written for Weekly Humorist, National Lampoon, American Bystander, Huff Post Comedy, McSweeney's, Bombeck Writers Workshop Blog and the Humor Times, written and/or produced for multiple TV shows and written standup material that's been performed on Maher, The Daily Show, Colbert, Kimmel, etc. Now, on to Paul's time-commanding Special Forces in Khandahar… (See all of Paul's "Ripping the Headlines Today" columns here.)
Paul Lander
Latest posts by Paul Lander (see all)

Making fun of the headlines today, so you don’t have to The news doesn’t need to be complicated and confusing; that’s what any new release from Microsoft is … Read more

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