Trump Financial Plan: Print More Money
The administration rolls out a plan to solve all the country’s financial woes: print as much money as needed. The Trump White House has announced a new economic … Read more
fake news
Presidential Committee Finds Liberal ‘Big Words’ Conspiracy
The reason for the President’s use of one- and two-syllable words vs ‘big words’ has been revealed. In an impromptu encounter on the White House steps, a small … Read more
63% of Aliens Believe Humans Haven’t Visited Earth
Aliens are now generally unsupportive of the idea that humans have, in any shape or form, been to Earth, according to new polling. In a new NBC/Marist poll, … Read more
Trump Demands that the Month of January be Renamed ‘Trumpery’
‘If Julius Caesar can have July, and Augustus has August, why can’t I have Trumpery? Anyone who says I can’t is fake news!’ – President Trump WASHINGTON – … Read more
Too Early to Rule Out Awesome, Gore-rific Shark Attack on Vacant Boat Floating Eerily in Harbor
Law enforcement officials say it is way too early to eliminate a badass shark attack as the cause for an abandoned boat spookily floating in the harbor of … Read more
Check, Please
Donald Trump is determined that someone is going to pay for his wall. “Hola!” You had better get used to the greeting folks because, apparently, we have all … Read more
God Says Eclipse Was a Warning Against ‘Antichrist’ in the White House
“This eclipse went right across America – coincidence? I deemeth not,” sayeth the Lord God: Exclusive interview! We obtained an exclusive interview with the Lord God via the … Read more
Bestselling Donald Trump Erotica Author Stumped Over Uses of ‘Their, They’re & There’
Bestselling Donald Trump erotica series comes to a screeching halt over confusing grammar rules HUNTINGTON, WV — Herbert “Herbdawg” Adkins’ bestselling Donald Trump erotica series of books came … Read more
Category 3 Hurricane Really Half-Assing It
Despite being afforded every opportunity since birth, Hurricane Chet is simply not living up to expectations. Expectations were significantly lowered this week after it became clear Hurricane Chet … Read more
Sarah Huckabee Sanders Thinks She’s So Cute When Using Snapchat
Other administration officials are not charmed by her Snapchat hobby, saying she “hogs the only White House cell phone.” White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders is a … Read more
